Fortunately..

Some people are extraordinarily fortunate..

This good fortune, it must be clarified, is something completely separate from that much-touted and misused word, 'luck', but the difference is subtle and needs putting in context. The Oxford dictionary defines luck as success or failure apparently brought by chance rather than through one's own actions, whilst according to the Cambridge definition, fortune is chance and the way it affects your life. One could argue that fortune, luck and chance are all equally arbitrary. That's fair enough but for the purposes of this piece I am drawing a line, between luck on the one side and fortune on the other.

"I hear people talk about luck a lot. Straight up – luck doesn’t exist. If you believe in luck, then you believe either:
(1) some people consistently defy probability, or,
(2) some things aren’t a result of cause and effect."
- Sebastian Marshall

Like our esteemed Mr. Marshall, I simply do not believe in luck. Aside from cursory use, I find the term is overused and wrongly applied to all manner of happenstance in life, from the mundane to the inexplicable. Fortune, however, seems to me to be rooted in chance - a quantifiable, measurable, tangible concept which one can apply logic and reason to, in order to analyse and understand its significance and the effect it has on things. Science and mathematics have established a whole world of knowledge on the understanding of chance, which is referred to as the laws of probability. Indeed, our very systems of governance and the implementation of policies as such is dictated largely by the nature of chance and probability.

In keeping with the logical, tangible route of understanding, I guess there are two angles from which one can assess an individual's level of good fortune in life. The internal qualities they possess which contribute to their success in the attainment of sort-after things, and the external factors which provide them with the means to get them. So if someone has self-confidence, high self-esteem, can maintain their sense of well-being, and possesses the ability to remain grounded, focused and determined to achieve their goals, they are pretty fortunate. Combine this with being in the right place at the right time when it comes to opportunities, having the material means to achieve things, such as money and resources, and knowing the right people to help achieve said goals, and one could say these individuals are indeed very fortunate.

Fortune favours the brave, right?

Well, yes and no. It is true that the internal qualities mentioned above, along with many others necessary to get along in life and achieve our goals, hopes and dreams can be learned, nurtured in our thinking, adopted into our mindset and practiced in daily living. However, this has to be weighed up against whatever physical, psychological and/or emotional limitations may well be present in the individual. It is also true that gaining money and resources, meeting and influencing the right people, and knowing when is the right time and place to actualise our plans are all achievable through hard work and dedication. The crucial thing here is to what extent a person, given their particular starting point, has the internal qualities required to progress, is able to learn and adopt the essential additional ones ad-hoc, and exactly what level of external resources and opportunities are actually available given the limitations of their physical, geographical, and socio-economic situation.

Many clichés echo through my mind at this point. 'If you put your mind to it, you can be capable of anything'. 'The world is your oyster'. 'Dream big'. 'Reach for the stars'. It can become almost nauseating hearing with such frequency these well-meaning but ultimately rather empty 'affirmations' being banded about, often by people in the media and such, who have obviously already achieved fame, fortune or whatever glamorous lifestyle is being touted as most desirable in life. The problem is, when you try to apply these 'life lessons' to your own goals you often find you have set yourself up for a fall. You can become very deflated and disillusioned, often coming to the swift conclusion that you just aren't that fortunate. Worse still, it is possible to end up in the bitter and jaded world of believing (often with very just cause) that no matter how much hard work and dedication you put in, the odds are just too stacked against your ever amounting to much.

"Don't try to understand everything. Because sometimes it's not meant to be understood, but to be accepted." - unknown

There are two other factors which come into play where fortune is concerned though. They are highly intangible, pretty illogical, not quantifiable through science or reason (thus far anyway) and very hard to explain beyond the realms of personal anecdotal experience. Here, we delve into the murky but rather wonderful world of 'mystery'. As immune as I try to stay from anything which can come under the umbrella term of magical thinking, there are two 'forces', for want of a better term, which have been at play in my life for as long as I can remember, helping and nurturing me (and others) to get through times of hardship, to achieve personal goals and to move onwards and upwards in life. They have both become as concrete in my mind as any concept provable by science, and are just as evidence-based as anything else one might mention, even if that evidence is purely anecdotal.

The first is karma, the Buddhist-originated spiritual principle of cause and effect, where intent and actions of an individual (cause) influence the future of that individual (effect). Karma in my life has always been absolutely apparent, present and in full effect - so much so that I can absolutely relate to what John Lennon was referring to in his song, 'Instant Karma'. I have never had to wait any time at all for proof that karma comes back to slap me in the face, should I stray from the good path. It is a force for good, which governs my thoughts and actions as a matter of course, framed by the overarching rule that when I project good out into the world, good things come back, and exactly the same with the bad.

The second is serendipity. Webster’s Dictionary defines serendipity as “the gift of finding valuable or agreeable things not sought for.” The key here is 'gift'. Serendipity is in every 'happy accident' that happens in life. Any time you find an answer without actually looking, discover something new and wonderful and beneficial to your life without trying, or are in the process of trying to solve something and find the solution takes you in a whole different direction, you have been given the gift of a serendipitous event. Best-selling author Scott Peck in his book 'The Road Less Travelled' has this to say - "serendipitous events occur to all of us, but frequently we fail to recognise their serendipitous nature; we consider such events quite unremarkable, and subsequently we fail to take full advantage of them." - Peck, M. Scott. (1978). The Road Less Travelled. p. 257-258.

So are you a person of good fortune, or not? Do you believe in luck, good or bad? One thing is for certain, chance is real - and whether evident in the minutia of your daily life or extractable from any experience you can recall where 'things just happened' - sometimes we can be fortunate and other times unfortunate. Perhaps it is merely our perspective on our lives, or other people's perspectives, that govern whether we consider a person to be one or the other. One thing I do know for sure is that sometimes I reflect on my life and feel pretty unfortunate, and see other people as really very fortunate indeed. It usually ends up with my feeling hopeless..

Important to remember then, that even the word hopeless has 'hope' in it.


Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Less Travelled Road

"Life is difficult. Confronting and solving problems is a painful process which most of us attempt to avoid. And the very avoidance results in greater pain and an inability to grow both mentally and spiritually." - M. Scott Peck.

Twenty years ago I readThe Road Less Travelled, from which this quote is taken. It changed my life. I have dipped in and out of it continuously ever since, recently giving it another complete re-read. More than just a self-help book, it is pretty much like a manual for life. Indeed, it has taught me more about myself, and how to handle life and live it well, than anything else I have ever read. The books title borrows from the famous poem, 'The Road Not Taken', by Robert Frost. The meaning I get from the poem is that there is always a choice, at least two paths one can take in life, and that the real rewards come from choosing the less travelled road.

It is my contention that there are often several paths, if not many, that one can take at any moment in life involving problems and pain. Conversely, however, sometimes the choice is just between two options, a straight challenge if you will. The point is that at any stage we always have a choice. Often in the case of only having one of two options, the conundrum becomes whether to choose short-term pain for long-term gain, or not. This, in a nutshell, is what Peck is describing in the above quote, and is the overall theme of the book - choosing to confront and solve problems as they arise, opting to go through the 'legitimate suffering' of that choice, rather than ignore problems in the hope they will go away, or deny they exist at all, which only results in further pain and unnecessary suffering further down the track.

   "Yes, there are two paths you can go by
    But in the long run
    There's still time to change the road you're on"
- excerpt from 'Stairway To Heaven' by Led Zeppelin

These life choices (and experience teaches me that they are indeed just that) dictate which road we are taking. It isn't that 'the easy option' is always wrong, not at all, it is simply that this option is rarely the right choice if we are to make any real progress, truly learn something, properly overcome our difficulties and become a better human being for it. Usually, the harder choice is just that because it involves really working at it, extending ourselves, getting well out of our comfort zones and taking on the risk of failure that goes with all that. It can feel like taking three steps back in order to take one forward sometimes, as we get bogged down with the discomfort, pain and suffering involved in our choice to change, to take the harder path, but ultimately what we are actually doing is taking a huge leap forward.

I have been on this less travelled road for the last twenty years, and this is my experience of it..

The road is long and bumpy. I have the semi-permanent blisters on my feet and the constant bruising to show for it - but with time calluses have developed and the bruises heal quicker. The road is winding and narrow, its meanders ever confusing, and relentless effort is required to stay on it - but each twist and turn reveals an ever more splendid view. Walking this path is very hard going, with all sorts of potholes and hidden pitfalls on the way - but the process of overcoming each and every obstacle has made me stronger and more resilient.

In places the road is overgrown with nasty brambles and stinging foliage. It can really hurt travelling this road. It is easy to stray off the path at any time and end up in a blind alley or dark thicket. Once one strays, the way back can seem impossible, and the longer one remains off-road the harder it is to find one's way back. When you have been walking that road a long while, then suddenly become stuck in one of the many dark patches hidden all around, the yearning to get back on the road quickly turns to desperation. But, when eventually one finds a way out of the hole and climbs back up onto the less travelled road, the relief is truly a new lease of life.

You may well find yourself asking some important questions by this point, such as..

• "This sounds like really hard work. Why do I need to put myself through this?"
• "Are there not shortcuts I can take?"
• "What about those people who seem to be just getting by without doing all this?"
• "How will I know if I am on the right road?"

Well, I can tell you what I have learned. Taking the road less travelled is bloody hard work. It is very uncomfortable and can be extremely painful, but the rewards of the journey far, far outweigh the temporary endurance of suffering. The road offers continuous personal, emotional and 'spiritual' growth, helping you to be a better person for yourself and everyone else. There are no shortcuts to this work though, and anyone claiming to have found any is peddling snake oil. And those people, the ones who seem to be getting by without doing all this - they only seem to be getting by. They are probably not growing at all, leaving them ill-equipped to deal with all of life's problems and eventually unable to handle the pain of the human condition.

You will know when you are on the right road. You will be in absolutely no doubt, because with each step you take your world will light up, illuminating the path ahead and revealing amazing possibilities you could never have foreseen. You will feel better. You will look better and you will see better. Everyone around you will notice the change, likely even before you do, and life will take on new meaning and relevance. You will be living a better, more positive, more satisfying and more loving existence, with all the wonders and nuances that come with that life.

This is the road less travelled..

And when people ask me why I choose it, if it's so difficult a path to tread, such a hard journey to go on, I can only smile and ask them, "why do you assume I see any other road?"

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

It Is, Is It?

I'm prone to paradoxical thinking. Since writing my first poetry, decades ago, through the ups and downs of life, right up to the here and now, I see paradoxes everywhere..

There are several ways one can define paradox. I most relate to this definition, from yourdictionary.com - a paradox is a statement that may seem absurd or contradictory but yet can be true, or at least makes sense. Paradoxes are often contrary to what is commonly believed and so play an important part in furthering our understanding in literature and everyday life, or they can simply be an entertaining brain teaser.

On the rare occasions when I review my old poetry, the raw bare bones of my life's experience, I find paradox litters the verses, and it really pleases me. I consider it a gift to be able to think this way, and as long as I've avoided delusion and confusion, paradoxical thinking has enhanced my ability to express myself in ways I could never have imagined. Much more importantly, paradoxical thinking is an intrinsic part of my thought process. It is, and probably always has been, integral to how I view my inner life and my outer world. I am definitely better off for it.

Enough blowing of one's own trumpet..

We may well all like our certainties in life, and find much comfort in choosing a side, adopting a stance or deciding upon one frame of mind over another - accepting as truth a particular way of looking at something, whilst rejecting out of hand what is contrary to that truth - but, although helpful in simplifying and clarifying things in our heads, is this actually not just closing ourselves off to the full range of possibility? Is 'certainty' not just merely another way of saying 'closed-minded'? To me, becoming 'set in my ways' is akin only to 'dying a slow death'. If I am not growing, I am dying.

By far, some of the most valuable lessons that life has taught me are; that it is only by maintaining an open mind, being as flexible as possible in the way I view the world, being mindful of the innate flaws and impediments built into the human condition, learning to accept how wrong I can be at any given time (and forgiving myself for that) and always being willing to extend myself to others and to the ever-changing nature of the world, that I can really hope to grow to become better, and maintain that growth throughout my whole life.

So, any alternative ways of framing my experience, of thinking very differently about things, has to be positive. Thinking paradoxically is one such way, and when it 'flows' out of me in the form of poetry I find it to be an amazing experience. On those aforementioned rare occasions of reading back my poems to myself, I find little gems lurking among the debris. Locks click open in my mind, the keys to which are the paradoxes I've identified in verse. The best part is that, with the passage of time and gaining of new experience, these gems shine even brighter, their meaning becomes new meaning, which in turn even inspires new thought processes, new verses, fresh creativity! A perfect antidote to the natural closing of the mind that age and bitter experience can often bring.

Here is just a handful of the myriad paradoxes which have become recurring themes for me - observations, if you will, just one man's slant on it:

• Life is all endings and beginnings - we have to experience the end of something in order to start anew.
• I am everything, and nothing - all I know and am is the sum total of my experience and how I feel about it, in the grand scheme of things I really know nothing.
• To be humble is powerful - the more humility, respect, conscientiousness, selflessness and kindness we put out into the world, the more we get right back.
• Love and hate are two sides of the same coin - To hate is merely love in reverse, and in hating we negate the possibility of love, it's a simple choice.
• Everything stays the same, but different - we can stick our heads in the sand and choose not to change, but the world, the people and everything else around us always will.

The world needs fresh thinking. Our lives could definitely benefit from different perspectives. Paradoxical thinking offers a seed which develops rapidly into roots, from which whole forests can eventually grow and thrive. All it takes is for one to plant the seed.

Having green fingers always did run in our family..

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Too Many Distractions

I was watching something the other day, in one of my moments of 'downtime', and somebody used the expression 'falsehoods and distractions'. It got me to thinking - our media is awash with this very stuff, falsehoods and distractions.

I have previously written quite a bit about falsehoods. In this piece I discuss fake news and the propaganda of governments, politicians and mainstream media. I touch on religious dogma and how it shapes us in another piece. And here I comment on the evils of deception, from the international/national level to the personal. One of my favourite writers recently published an incredibly insightful piece, encapsulating how falsehood is put upon on us from birth right up until death, and I strongly urge you to read it here. So, in this piece I will focus on the second part of that expression I heard - distractions..

Distractions can be good, right? Everyone needs them sometimes, to help us forget for a moment whatever harsh realities we are dealing with in our personal or working lives. Sometimes we need frivolous television programs to just forget about the awfulness in the world, don't we? Well, I agree, to an extent. I'm not immune from the pull of the occasional mindless show. How often though have you considered the actual level and amount of this valueless, superficial and basically pointless material there is on our screens? And have you noticed how this type of material soaks up the vast majority of prime-time TV scheduling, and just how popular it actually is?

Before I continue, a disclaimer - your choice of entertainment is a very subjective thing, personal to you and a part of the action of exercising your choice. I'm not here to extol the virtues of one type of entertainment over another, or condemn anyone for what they choose to watch. In identifying certain things here I will undoubtedly raise eyebrows, but that is just an extension of my particular set of choices when it comes to entertainment. Indeed, I will explain something of the personal nature of what we call entertainment as you read on.

The culture we live in used to baffle me. If you use television as a barometer, you could conclude that we are obsessed with celebrity and fame, especially of the instant, throwaway kind offered up as if it were virtue by reality TV and 'talent' shows. An ever increasing variety and number of game shows offer short term financial gain for answering trivia and questions of a decreasingly intellectual value. Sport is littered with examples of people who make millions on the back of a couple of years in the limelight before retiring in their thirties and disappearing back into obscurity. Mass sporting events are just one big distraction. This culture baffles me no longer however. All this 'entertainment' is part of a plan - distraction of the masses.

'News' and current affairs on TV is all but replaced by an orchestrated series of choice snippets of biased hearsay and the opinions of established pseudo-journalists, politicians and pundits. The chosen stories are given precedence according to an agenda set by the elite and those with power, to spread their narrative and distract from more inconvenient truths. Documentaries, particularly those dealing with history, are an exercise in reinforcement of whatever fairytale can most easily be made to fit. There is no real intelligent debate, no room for radical thinking and no balancing of falsehoods with truth.

So what are we being kept from watching, or doing with our time, by the these 'weapons of mass distraction'? We are being prevented from learning all sides of things, from seeking truth, from changing our minds about challenging issues, from growing as people and as a species. The reason all this entertainment of dubious value is so popular is that it prays on the innate human flaw of entropy - that inbuilt laziness in us all that prevents us from seeking enlightenment, knowledge, expansion of our hearts and minds and a broadening of our horizons. A little distraction here and there is healthy. Swamping us with mass distraction all the time is just destructive.

Call me old school but I remember when people used to read books for fun. I remember conversation and expanding the mind through personal interaction. I remember not having to fit the really beneficial things in life, the quality time, into a damn TV schedule or someone's Netflix binge-watching. And I'm only forty-one for heaven's sake. What media one chooses to consume is one's own affair. I guess what I am trying to say is that surely, we can make better choices?

If entertainment is for escape, why can't we escape in a different way? Watch a little less sport, less reality TV, less celebrity tittle-tattle. Do a bit of research online and find meaningful, positive, beneficial, nurturing, wholesome entertainment that might just teach you something whilst relaxing you. Share the best of the good stuff you find with as many others as you can - talk about it, laugh about it, spread it like it's going out of fashion - because it certainly seems to be.

"Sadly, many in our world today encourage idleness, especially in the form of mindless, inane entertainment that is on the Internet, on television, and in computer games." - Joseph B. Wirthlin

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Don't Panic

Imagine for a moment the most terrifying instance of panic you've ever experienced in your life..

Whatever caused you to go into panic mode, I expect you could describe to me a feeling like a dreadful suffocating helplessness, of being completely overwhelmed by a crippling sense of dread and anguish. I would further postulate that the psychological/emotional aspects of this panic were nothing in comparison to the physical sensations - sweating hot, adrenalin pumping, stomach retching, fists clenched, head pounding, ears ringing, trembling, shaking, unable to catch your breath as the rising crescendo of absolute terror gripped every fibre of your being. Perhaps you even experienced a state of hyper-reality, where everything around you seemed to go into slow motion, or conversely everything sped up. The world got very weird, very quickly. Maybe a few of you have even experienced hallucinations - saw or heard unreal things, experienced odd tastes or felt warped things touching your body, in your moment of pure panic?

I bet most all of us, to a greater or lesser degree, have had at least a moment where something happened - some event, be it an accident, receiving terrible news, a sudden shock - which triggered the cascade of emotions and physical sensations in the body that we call panic. Blind panic. No reasoning kicked in to steady our thinking, no logic or sound advice helped us feel better, we just got hit full in the face and instantly fell apart. Anxiety took over control of our senses, our thinking, our emotions, even perhaps our basic bodily functions. For a moment, we just lost it, and in that moment nothing and nobody could make us feel better..

Human beings have an innate ability to respond to stressful situations, or stressors as they are better known. Science calls this the 'fight or flight response'. It is also known as hyperarousal, or the acute stress response, and is a physiological reaction that occurs in response to a perceived harmful event, attack, or threat to survival. Essentially, the response prepares the body to either fight or flee the threat. It is an ancient part of us that has served humankind well in the past, especially when we lived in caves and had to sustain ourselves through the perils of attack from all sides by wildlife and other humans. It is coded into our DNA, and an unavoidable physical function of our body.

Psychology, in combination with biology and to some extent also social science, teaches us that our acute stress response can often lead us into trouble. Modern life has enabled humans to escape, and be insulated from, most of the threats to survival on a daily basis that the fight or flight response was useful for. There are just hardly ever instances in life these days where it is appropriate, useful or healthy to either run away or fight a particular 'perceived threat' - and these perceived threats can often be the result of faulty perception in the first place.

So, 'general anxiety', a feeling of unease and worry, can lead to panic - a sudden sensation of fear, which is so strong as to dominate or prevent reason and logical thinking, replacing it with overwhelming feelings of angst and frantic agitation consistent with an animalistic fight-or-flight reaction. Anxiety can be referred to as a normal part of life, but only if it has a quantifiable source, if the cause of a person's angst can be traced using logic and reason. If there are no causes, no logical reasons for the state of anxiety, and this state persists for days, weeks or months at a time, one can reasonably conclude that a person may well be suffering from a general anxiety disorder.

All this fine scientific talk, logic and reason is great. It all makes sense, and it helps us understand the basics of what is going on when somebody we know, perhaps someone we love, is suffering with anxiety issues. The problem is that when anxiety becomes panic, when the level of discomfort gets to be too much for someone to cope with, all reason and logic becomes irrelevant. That person is unable to deal with anything and everything, instantaneously. They cannot think straight, relate properly to others or cope effectively with life, and as the panic rises it is all they can do to simply function, to prevent themselves from being a danger to themselves or others, and to get through the terrible irrational fear that they are about to die. They walk a tightrope stretched over a row of jagged knives every moment of every day, and everyone around them is forced to walk on eggshells, and take extreme care not to bump into them for fear that their fragile glass bubbles will shatter and leave them bare.

The worst part of life for someone with an anxiety disorder is that they don't want it to affect others around them, which is compounded and made doubly difficult by the fact that once in the turmoil of an episode they are unable to explain what is happening, unable to avoid snapping and getting angry with others, and unable to control their emotions. So when they get through any given clash, argument, fight or moment of madness they then have to deal with terrible feelings of guilt and a lingering sense of remorse that they affected others with 'their shit'. This completes the cycle, of worry - anxiety - panic - anxiety - worry, a very vicious circle indeed. Long term, this cycle can lead to so much loss; of self-esteem, of status in life, of friends and family, of reputation, of drive and energy, of positivity, of peace of mind, ultimately of ability to live life and remain sane.

So, if I have any advice for dealing with someone's anxiety problem, it is this:

I don't want to patronise you, or preach to the converted. I guess I'm saying that, as a sufferer of an anxiety disorder, I can help you understand, I can help you to empathise. So try this - the next time you have to deal with somebody you know, somebody you might care about, somebody you love even, who has issues with anxiety and is going through a tough time, remember your worst ever moment of blind panic in life. Imagine every second of your day was wracked with anxiety, with no reason for it and no cause, and that at any given moment that panic could rise and you could explode as the feelings inside come flying out. Now double it. Then double it again. That is what is going on for them, pretty much all of the time. And it never really goes away.

It is a lot to ask, for you to make allowances for and give the benefit of the doubt to someone, especially when you least feel like it. It is an even bigger ask to try to show someone what psychologists call 'unconditional positive regard' - to suspend judgement about them, to be patient when they struggle with negativity, to overlook their behaviour because you know they can't help it and to be ever mindful that they might not show you any appreciation for all of this. In the end though, you will have helped them overcome something truly awful - the feeling that they are losing control. And really, you just never know when you too might need someone who understands..

“Anxiety is love's greatest killer. It makes others feel as you might when a drowning man holds on to you. You want to save him, but you know he will strangle you with his panic.”
― Anaïs Nin

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Life's Rich Tapestry

This is a true story. Allow me to paint a picture..

In a small, average seaside town on the south-east coast of England, populated largely by pensioners and young families, situated on one of the main shopping streets is an average building, converted into six flats. There's nothing special about this building. It looks pretty much like any other from the outside, a bit weather-worn and in need of a coat of paint, with a busy and popular shop located below it.

The flats in this building are a mix of rented and owned homes, and in recent years residents have come and gone, as people do. The building has had its share of problems, and continuing issues with ongoing maintenance, but it is over a hundred years old and doesn't receive the attention such an elderly building needs. An average situation, for this average building, in this average town.

The current residents of the building come from a broad church. One flat is owned by an Asian couple, who live with their young daughter. They run one of the struggling small local shops. Another flat is home to a young white British tenant couple. He works part-time doing deliveries for a local business, she is a full-time student and also works part-time for a local shop. They have a young child between them, and his teenage daughter, of mixed British/Asian heritage, completes the family.

Another flat is owner-occupied, a single-parent family consisting of a Polish mother and her son, born in Britain to an absent British father. She works full-time locally. Then there's a flat housing an older Bulgarian tenant couple, probably in their sixties. He is frail and in rapidly failing health, whilst she is a full-time local care worker and his primary carer. They have a son, daughter-in-law and grandchildren living locally.

Another flat is home for a young eastern-European tenant couple, quite probably Romanian. They seem to be absent during the daytime most days, in all likelihood because they work away from the area. The last flat has the buildings newest tenants, a young white British couple with a dog. She is rarely seen whilst he is often about locally walking the dog. It is impossible to gauge whether they work.

So what is the point of the story?

Let us just say that the people who live in this building have all had various interactions with each other, to a greater or lesser degree. Obvious, you might think, after all they are each others neighbours. But how well do they all really know each other? Well, I can tell you that none of them are actually friends, or spend any time together socially, and although some know more about one set of residents than the others, they are all basically just strangers. Beyond the practicalities of the tiny amount of communication necessary for living in a shared building, no one really knows what kind of person anyone else is.

Life in this building is a microcosm of modern life in Britain. In a humble English town, not known for its diversity, we have a mixed-race, multi-ethnic, multi-cultural mini-community of different kinds of families. There have been a few minor squabbles, a little anti-social behaviour and some decidedly unneighbourly behaviour at odd times, but on the whole the people who live together here do so in peace, without coming into regular conflict.

To read British newspapers, watch television news or listen to popular radio you could easily believe that the families and couples who live in the aforementioned building should basically be at war, such should be their hatred for each other. An awfully large number of the more elderly residents of the town certainly seem to frown and look down on these people. Immigrants, 'broken' families, mixed-race kids, ethnic minorities, the working poor, the struggling small-business owner, the unemployed, the sick and disabled - all these economically disadvantaged groups are represented in just one building, in one sleepy little English town. The fact that there is no real conflict, and everyone basically gets along, is testament to the reality of British life, and lays bare the fallacies we are being fed by the mainstream media in this country.

The dangers of judging people, based on anything other than really getting to know them as a person, are huge. We all make assumptions, and have presumptions and preconceptions about people. These have to be constantly challenged if we are to avoid them building up and disordering our thinking, only to become prejudice, racism, xenophobia and hatred, which inevitably leads to misery and conflict. Yet the benefits of changing our thinking, accepting people for who they really are rather than what they might seem to represent, ignoring the falsehoods and lies spread about them and the yarns that society and the media try to spin, are so huge. To live in peace with people from all different kinds of background, race, culture and economic situation is a gift that never stops giving. It helps promote equality, understanding and tolerance. It enriches our thinking, our culture and our lives. Ultimately, it makes the world a better place to live in.

You know how I know this story is true?

It's because this is my story. I am one of the people living in that building. This is my home town and it is my personal experience I am telling you about.

I'll leave you to decide which flat I live in..

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Just To Clarify

Apparently, I'm 'very political'..

That's a very strange thing to me. Obviously it is a strong perception that people have of me, that I am political, even too political. It's strange, because honestly, I absolutely loathe and detest politics, politicians and political parties. I have zero interest in getting mixed up in all that shit, ever.

Folks, I hate to burst your bubble (not) but I am apolitical.  In the Oxford English dictionary, political is defined as 'relating to the government or public affairs of a country'. Sure, often I am concerned with the evils perpetrated by governments, and yes sometimes my views are UK-centric, but my concerns are global and my focus is on the whole of humanity. Any link with established political views, party or otherwise, is just pure coincidence. I actively fight against the inbuilt bias that arises from my geographic and societal boundaries. The internal party politics of any one particular country is so far from my area of interest it's almost invisible to me.

Our esteemed Oxford dictionary defines apolitical as 'not interested or involved in politics'. That's me. Just because I post meme's and react to news items on social media, and sign the odd petition, doesn't mean I'm interested in a career in parliament. It's just not on my radar. I'm encouraged by the fact that for every one person who doesn't like my posts, I've had compliments from four or five. It's not necessary, but it sure raises the spirit.

One of the most common reasons why people label you 'political' is so that they can dismiss anything you say that they don't agree with, find uncomfortable or challenging, or otherwise don't want to acknowledge. When something rattles me, I feel compelled to express my views (sorry, not sorry). These views develop in response to an ongoing and ever-expanding awareness of the bigger picture, the issues that I believe to be fundamental ills and wrongs in the world. It is merely a part of the picture that the responsibility for these wrongs nearly always lies with politicians, their paymasters in big business and their co-conspirators in mainstream media. I am constantly engaged in a process (again, always developing) of identifying sources, fact-checking, cross-referencing, analysing, evaluating and finally sharing and/or debating these matters. I don't just shoot from the hip. I discard far, far more ideas than I share, because they do not hold up to scrutiny.

What concerns me greatly, even scares me, is the masses of people who turn off and just shut down, the moment anything they are hearing or seeing can be construed as (too) political in some way. Elections are won by morons with evil ideas because people are so apathetic they can't even be bothered to vote, and the most common reasons people give are, "well I just don't understand it all", or simply, "I don't do politics". Oh the irony. We all have a vested interest in learning at least the basic mechanisms with which politicians and political parties influence and govern people. Everything you hold dear in life and the future of you and your family depends on what these self-serving single-minded lying scumbags do. It's all about awareness.

Time and time again I find myself being doubted, questioned, derided and even excluded for my opinions. In the past it has pained me, I still have occasional moments when it bothers me, but those moments are getting fewer and further between. It's all about having the courage of your convictions. You have to do the self-awareness work it takes to stay open-minded whilst being assertive about your stance, establishing and maintaining healthy checks and balances on your reasoning, and above all, always revising and allowing changes to your mindset when new information presents itself.

So I'm apolitical. Unapologetically, unabashedly, unreservedly so.

Is that too political for you?

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Not Broken

When you see someone smiling, getting on with their job or whatever, seeming content, how do you really know that they're okay? Do you take on face value how that person comes across? Do you find yourself wondering how they do it? How they maintain their repose even in really stressful situations? Do you maybe even feel a hint of envy on some level that they have it so apparently easy, or that they handle life so well?

Well, I have to tell you, don't do that..

Nobody has it easy.

Take the most relaxed, calm, agreeable person you know. You don't know what depths of hell they might have plumbed before they arrived at a point where they could be at peace with life. How about the strong, dependable, kind and funny person you love to be around? Hard to imagine them at the bottom of a bottle and wasted on drugs, a hopeless, selfish, destructive addict, for years on end. What of the single mother you know and see as a perfect role model, dedicated, selfless and nurturing with every ounce of her being - worlds apart from the suffocation of the abusive, oppressive, authoritarian parents she had to endure.

Think about everyone you know, everyone you meet and everyone you know of. How many of them would you say are really okay? What exactly is okay anyway? Normal? Then, what exactly is normal?

Many people equate normality with being happy. I hate to break it to them, but happy is not normal. It's simply not a normal human state of mind. Happiness comes in fits and starts. It's a nice meal, a crafty smoke, an orgasm. Happy is a fleeting and temporary emotion, and those who think they can live life in a perpetual state of happiness are deluded. Worse, those who constantly pursue this state of mind are heavily prone to falling. That path is littered with the unavoidable traps of habituation, addiction and obsession, and its destination is the mirror opposite of anything good.

We've been brainwashed by a mono-culture, born of a profoundly sick society, that holds that anyone who isn't 'happy' has something fundamentally wrong with them. They must not be making enough 'effort' in life, not putting in enough 'work'. They do not fit into the illusion of a perfect life that society has deemed acceptable, an illusion manufactured with the sole purpose of making people feel inadequate in the first place purely so that they'll buy stuff they don't really need to try to feel better.

I'm here to tell you it is okay to be not okay. It's not only okay, it's far healthier than pretending otherwise. Everyone has their cross to bare. The trick is to do it with some grace and style, if you can, and if you can't, seek help, find support and learn how to change the way you are thinking about all of this. It's a long and difficult road, but the journey teaches you more than you ever thought possible.

Unusually for this blog, I decided to end on a poem which I wrote the other week, if you'll indulge me..

How do you fix what is not broken?
When you think your latest foolish notion
Is some groundbreaking observation
As it provides you with false elation,
Carries you along on its high ride,
Until you hit the flip side,
Surfing sudden strong waves incoming on the tide
To arrive at the dark island where you hide.

Temporary solace can be found there,
You can wallow in apathy, pretend you don't care,
But sooner or later reality will start biting.
You either collapse or come out fighting,
The fight is like trying to reach the ceiling
Of the fleeting feelings that gave you meaning,
Whilst reeling from an invisible attack
By the blackness of thoughts held back.

"If it ain't broke don't try to fix it" they say,
But you found the exception to the rule today,
By stumbling through darkness you found a light,
Extracting insight from the forces that blight.
The road less travelled reveals so much more,
It shows you what the pain is really all for,
It's worth years of tears for the wisdom you get
And the peace of a life free from fear of regret.

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Keeping It Real

So, are you a 'glass half full' or 'glass half empty' kind of person?

That old cliché attempts to classify people into one of two camps, the half full glasses of the optimists or the half empty vessels of the pessimists. But what if you are neither? Too often we seek to oversimplify that which is deeply complicated, but conversely, we need a measure of simplicity in order to understand and make sense of the otherwise complex nature of things.

What we are talking about here is fundamental to how we view ourselves and our place in the world, and also how we view others around us. By extension, the optimist versus pessimist debate is another example of 'black and white' thinking. We probably all know people who would call themselves optimists. We may even concur that they do indeed generally possess a positive worldview and seem to look for the best in any given situation. Pessimists are far less likely to identify themselves as such, but I can almost guarantee you can think of someone you know who you might be tempted to label as negative in their outlook. Someone who often fails to see the good in things, and for whom there appears to be no light at the end of the tunnel.

My contention is that you cannot realistically divide people into one of these two 'black and white' camps without ignoring the shades of grey in between. Thankfully I am not alone in my musings. Among other insights, a random google search brought me to this page. There are some interesting variations on the theme here:

• Kate Brown - "We need to quit arguing about whether the glass is half full or half empty - and instead acknowledge that there's not quite enough water to go round."
• Scott Stossel - "There are lots of things, including changing the kind of inner dialog, that can mitigate anxiety. And yes, there are people who have the glass half full and glass half empty, and I'm afraid the glass is going to break and I'll cut myself on the shards."
• Brad Thor - "If we talk about the glass being half empty or half full, I want to know what does the glass look like from underneath the table?"

Sometimes I can relate to the optimists, with their half filled glasses, but unfortunately I have found that rose-coloured spectacles simply do not suit me. Sometimes I sympathise with the pessimists point of view. Whether due to a string of disappointments in life, or one big letdown, they have chosen to be negative. There's a weird kind of comfort in that. For a while. Ultimately though, and in spite of misery loving company so much, I have neither found that there is anything to gain from negativity, nor do I get along in the long term with those whose glasses are half empty.

If we have a fixed view of ourselves and our place in the world, and indeed of others and their place, aren't we basically stuck? The world changes every single day, sometimes more than once in a twenty-four hour period. There is good, and bad, and everything in between, going on all the time. If we choose to fix our minds into a rigid way of viewing our lives and the people in it, surely we are engaging in a destructive act of self-sabotage? Our flexibility and propensity to handle change, our ability to adjust according to our needs and the needs of others, our capacity for revising our thinking when we are in the wrong, our means of attaining and maintaining good judgment, our potential to challenge ourselves, all these skills and more effectively become shut down when we get stuck.

So, at this point in life, if forced to define myself in simplistic terms, I am a realist. The glass is neither half full nor half empty. It's just a glass. I hadn't really bothered to examine this further until recently, but during my latest reading I did find a couple of images that stood out for me..

You see, it's not all good being a realist. Life has taught me that one of the greatest skills you can possess is dedication to reality, at all costs. I am always trying to live up to this, but it has a big downside. The reality of the taxing and difficult situations the world presents us with can often be bleak, unpalatable and potentially very depressing. It is easier to forgo the effort and discomfort, and more often than not, do the hard work and accept the pain it takes to overcome something personally difficult, or to assimilate some bad news, or to accept something we find patently horrible, purely for the sake of avoiding the difficulty of dealing with it. But each and every time we avoid this legitimate and necessary suffering, no matter how seemingly insignificant we might deduce it to be, we increase our inherent ignorance, expand our prejudices and faulty presumptions, further close our minds and hearts, and essentially magnify the power of natural entropy that lies within us.

When an optimist is faced with one such situation they will inevitably find solace in some throwaway comment or thought, "well, such is life." This is all well and good, as long as the baby doesn't drown in the sewer as it gets flushed away with the bathwater, which happens all too often. 'Blind optimism' is an occupational hazard when your glass is always half full. In exactly the same way, the pessimist will be so busy with their conviction that "life's a bitch and then you die", they'll fail to notice that not everyone is a bitch. When they reach the light at the end of the particular tunnel they are busy travelling down, their response is simply, "great, now I'm blinded by that fucking light."

Never one to rest on my laurels, comfort is something that is regularly extremely hard for me to find. That's fine. I choose to be a realist, and all that comes with it. I choose to be fully conscious of all shades of life, the good, the bad and the ugly. I choose to see the world and the people in it through a prism of self-awareness and empathy. To me, these are both qualities that require constant learning and practice. No one has them in spades. Sure, some people have a greater or lesser propensity for them, but if one practices self-awareness daily, using the many tools available to learn from books and on websites, even totally lost souls can eventually establish these healthy checks and balances on their thinking. Likewise with empathy, if we choose to open up to the feelings and suffering of others, in all it's depths, our hearts can grow less cold and we can enable a much healthier mindset, in which the seeds of positive change might grow.

So that's where I'm at. It's a matter of perspective, I guess. My preference for science and reason probably drew me to the second image, and to conclude, for now, that my glass is completely full.

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Tin Foil Hats

Important note: I did not write this. I found it among some articles I had saved on an old hard drive the other day. Sadly I never recorded the source. If anyone can identify it I would be grateful, and will of course be happy to credit the writer, or remove it from my blog if they so wish. I just felt it was too good a piece to leave languishing in my archives.

Most people can’t resist getting the details on the latest conspiracy theories, no matter how far-fetched they may seem. At the same time, many people quickly denounce any conspiracy theory as untrue … and sometimes as unpatriotic or just plain ridiculous.

Lets not forget all of the thousands of conspiracies out of Wall Street like Bernie Madoff and many others to commit fraud and extortion, among many crimes of conspiracy. USA Today reports that over 75% of personal ads in the paper and on craigslist are married couples posing as single for a one night affair. When someone knocks on your door to sell you a set of knives or phone cards, anything for that matter, do they have a profit motive? What is conspiracy other than just a scary way of saying “alternative agenda”? When 2 friends go to a bar and begin to plan their wingman approach on 2 girls they see at the bar, how often are they planning on lying to those girls? “I own a small business and am in town for a short while. Oh yeah, you look beautiful.

Conspiracy theory is a term that originally was a neutral descriptor for any claim of civil, criminal or political conspiracy. However, it has come almost exclusively to refer to any fringe theory which explains a historical or current event as the result of a secret plot by conspirators of almost superhuman power and cunning. To conspire means “to join in a secret agreement to do an unlawful or wrongful act or to use such means to accomplish a lawful end.” The term “conspiracy theory” is frequently used by scholars and in popular culture to identify secret military, banking, or political actions aimed at stealing power, money, or freedom, from “the people”.

To many, conspiracy theories are just human nature. Not all people in this world are honest, hard working and forthcoming about their intentions. Certainly we can all agree on this. So how did the term “conspiracy theory” get grouped in with fiction, fantasy and folklore? Maybe that’s a conspiracy, just kidding. Or am I

Skeptics are important in achieving an objective view of reality, however, skeptism is not the same as reinforcing the official storyline. In fact, a conspiracy theory can be argued as an alternative to the official or “mainstream” story of events. Therefore, when skeptics attempt to ridicule a conspiracy theory by using the official story as a means of proving the conspiracy wrong, in effect, they are just reinforcing the original “mainstream” view of history, and actually not being skeptical. This is not skeptism, it is just a convenient way for the establishment view of things to be seen as the correct version, all the time, every time. In fact, it is common for “hit pieces” or “debunking articles” to pick extremely fringe and not very populated conspiracy theories. This in turn makes all conspiracies on a subject matter look crazy. Skeptics magazine and Popular Mechanics, among many others, did this with 9/11. They referred to less than 10% of the many different conspiracy theories about 9/11 and picked the less popular ones, in fact, they picked the fringe, highly improbable points that only a few people make. This was used as the “final investigation” for looking into the conspiracy theories. Convenient, huh?

In fact, if one were to look into conspiracy theories, they will largely find that thinking about a conspiracy is associated with lunacy and paranoia. Some websites suggest it as an illness. It is also not surprising to see so many people on the internet writing about conspiracy theories in a condescending tone, usually with the words “kool-aid,” “crack pot,” or “nut job” in their articulation. This must be obvious to anyone that emotionally writing about such serious matter insults the reader more than the conspiracy theorist because there is no need to resort to this kind of behavior. It is employed often with an “expert” who will say something along the lines of, “for these conspiracies to be true, you would need hundreds if not thousands of people to be involved. It’s just not conceivable.”

I find it extremely odd that the assumption is on thousands of participants in a conspiracy. I, for one, find it hard to believe any conspiracy involving more than a handful of people but the fact remains that there have been conspiracies in our world, proven and not made up, that involved many hundreds of people. It’s not a matter of opinion, it’s a matter of fact.

One more thing to consider, have you noticed that if the conspiracy is involving powerful interests with the ability to bribe, threaten or manipulate major institutions (like the mafia, big corporations or government) then don’t you find it odd when people use one of those as the “credible” counter-argument? What I mean is, if you are discussing a conspiracy about the mafia, and someone hands you a debunking article that was written by the mafia, it doesn’t seem like it would take rocket science to look at that with serious criticism and credibility. This is the case with many conspiracies. In fact, I am handed debunking pieces all the time written in many cases by the conspirators in question. Doesn’t this seem odd to anybody else but me??

While intelligent cynicism certainly can be healthy, though, some of the greatest discoveries of all time were initially received (often with great vitriol) as blasphemous conspiracy theories — think of the revelation that the earth was not the center of the universe, or that the world was not flat but actually round.

The Stupidity Of Deception

Yesterday the US envoy to the UN, Nikki Haley (read Hatey) said of the decision to pull out of the United Nations Human Rights Council, "the body is hypocritical and self-serving and makes a mockery of human rights". This comes on the very same day that a recording of children crying out for their parents from the inside of cages at the Mexican border was released, Trump vehemently defending the policy of enforced separation with his 'national security' narrative. Hmm.. Hypocrisy .. a mockery of human rights .. can they really be that transparent?

Whether we're dealing with the deception of the individual in everyday life, or within the propaganda machine of a government, the thing with the lies people tell to try to hide their own faults is it's almost inevitable they will give themselves away through classic projection. The cornered animal, refusing to face the consequences of its actions to the last, will project its flaws onto those who they feel under attack from. The pot calling the kettle black, if you will. In their rush to defend their position they often are the very last to realise they have revealed themselves for what they are.

The level of sophistication involved in the fairy tales we hear from characters like Donald Trump, Nikki Haley, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Benjamin Netanyahu and all those others preceding them is, frankly, laughable. They ooze the slime of falsehood from every pore. They betray their shaky narratives within single sentences on a regular basis. They assert their deceptions in bold type, only to belie themselves in the very next breath. Watching the current US administration now is eerily reminiscent of the footage of 'comical Ali' from the first Gulf War, as Trump tweets how well his policies are going whilst the facts on the ground simultaneously show us the opposite truth, whilst Netanyahu is doing a fine impression of Tony Blair in the run up to the Iraq War, with his powerpoint presentations of the 'threat from Iran' which turns out to be decade-old intelligence. These people don't learn from history, such is their exceptionally tiny world view. They don't even possess the wit, charm or intelligence to use rhetoric.

Of course the US wants out of the UNHRC. Human rights are an inconvenience to an administration that wants to cull all protest, monitor all mass communication, further control the media, deport anyone who isn't basically a member of the gammonati and pursue it's self-serving agenda in the guise of 'America first'. Haley showed just how shaky the US position is becoming last month, when following the dreadful Israeli killings of unarmed Palestinian protesters, she simply walked out of the UN Security Council meeting just as the Palestinian envoy was about to speak. It is obvious why. There is only so much defending of the indefensible you can do.

Sadly, there are still an awful lot of people in the general population who choose to believe the lies they are told. Maybe it fits in with their own narrative, or sits comfortably with them because they tell themselves the same lie. Some people start to smell a rat but decide they don't have the time and won't make the effort to delve beyond the surface. Some would rather avoid the inevitable conflict, whether it comes in the form of an argument with somebody or a challenging of their internal dialogue. But it is always a choice. It is harder to challenge deception than to just swallow it hook, line and sinker, but in the long run you do yourself a major disservice by accepting falsehoods or allowing yourself to be lied to with impunity. You effectively enable your own manipulation, and that constitutes a diminishing of your power of control over your own mind.

There exists examples though of a much darker, more insipid, downright clever kind of deception, most often associated with psychopaths. Never to be confused with psychotics, who can commit so-called 'evil' acts through no fault of their own due to their detachment from reality, the psychopath who chooses to lie and deceive will manipulate people and situations systematically, methodically and intelligently, sometimes in a planned fashion for years at a time, to whatever ends they have designed. These individuals can be found anywhere in life, but there is a growing bank of evidence to suggest that psychopaths, or at least those with psychopathic traits, are often to be found in positions of power in the world of finance, business, media and government. It is not that much of a stretch to see that this makes sense. Top politicians, bankers, media barons and company directors routinely have to make decisions that enrich the elite and dump on everyone else whilst telling the public they are doing the opposite.

We have to hope that the basic, low-level morons who constitute a good deal of current world leaders are not eventually replaced by far more sophisticated agents of catastrophe. As it stands, we can safely say that those in power at present vary from the easily condemnable to fertile grounds for satire. If the lessons of history teach us anything about mass deception it is that it only takes one psychopath, planning and orchestrating at the right time and in the right place, to engineer the subjugation, slavery and death of millions. If we begin at the individual level, refusing to tolerate liars and calling them out whenever we find them, we stand the best chance of avoiding the very worst of outcomes for ourselves and every else.

The truth will out .. but sometimes it needs help.

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Green Eyes

I often find myself envious of people. That is not an easy thing to acknowledge. It is certainly important to identify why this is, especially as it is definitely contributing to my being unhappy. So forgive me if this post is rather self-indulgent. I hope it is still worth sharing.

First off, I need to counter the tendency to think that because there are people worse off than me I shouldn't be unhappy. If this were true then I shouldn't ever feel happy because there are always people better off than me, right? The whole process we tend to go through of comparing ourselves to others is always a self-destructive one anyway. It is never a healthy way to think. That said, I recognise that there is an element of projection going on in this process - alone within ourselves, we tend to project our feelings, particularly our faults and flaws, onto others, even though we know at heart we are all on our own paths.

I am at a stage in life where it is frequently pointed out to me, mainly by the media rather than other people, that there are certain things I should have. Chief among these is having a career and owning my own property. These prime markers of 'life after forty' are things which, to be honest, I have basically no hope of having. Property prices in my part of the world are insane. My career prospects are all but zero. That said, I have a basic job which I enjoy, and myself and my family are relatively comfortable in our privately rented flat. We are not wealthy, but we just about have enough money to manage.

Material things used to be a big issue for me. Twenty years ago I would have had very different priorities, but these days I have come to the point where, aside from paying for life's essentials and the occasional treat, I honestly do not care about money. So I certainly don't envy others in a material sense, but what is at the root of my disquiet?

My history of mental illness would seem to be the logical source of my unhappiness in life. However, despite the ongoing battle with anxiety and the ever-present possibility of a bipolar relapse, I am basically stable and have been for years, and I have never been in a better position to deal with issues as they arise. I am high-functioning - I live a 'normal' life and have a wife and family around me. There is a caveat though. Deep down I do harbor a definite sense of unfairness at the cards life has dealt me. I wonder how my life would have gone if mental illness had not basically stolen my youth. I am envious of people who are not so afflicted.

It is difficult to state that you are of above average intelligence and are highly intellectual without sounding arrogant, but there it is! One would assume this to be a good thing, but in my experience it is more often a curse than a blessing. Our society does not seem to value strong, independent thinkers. Intellectuals have to fight through layers of dross and there are many barriers preventing them from fulfilling their potential. There is a reason why many of the great artists and revolutionary thinkers in history died poor and uncelebrated in their time. I do not claim to be at that level, but I do have an overwhelming sense that my true peers are a million miles away. I am envious of people who do not think so much.

I am envious of the 'average Joe', those people who are happy to just coast along and live an 'average' life. Those people who are happy working nine to five, coming home to watch TV, going to the pub at the weekend, or whatever. I am envious of those people who's goals eventually fit nicely into a career or who's talents lead them into business. Those people who's education actually gave them a path into a fulfilling and prosperous future doing something they love. I am envious of people who didn't spend some of the best years of their lives battling just to survive against an invisible foe that threatened to kill them.

We each have our own measures of success, which should always be a personal thing, not something dictated to us by anyone or anything else. By my own definition of success I am not unsuccessful - I have my wife and family whom I love and who love me, I have a job I enjoy, I have a home and I can get by financially. What I am though is unfulfilled. I feel I have only just arrived at 'day zero', and I have no idea how to proceed. Perhaps much of the envy I feel is natural, but it doesn't help me feel any better. I just feel selfish, and empty.

All I can do is hold on to hope, and believe that this too shall pass. “When you walk to the edge of all the light you have and take that first step into the darkness of the unknown, you must believe that one of two things will happen. There will be something solid for you to stand upon or you will be taught to fly.” - Patrick Overton

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

End Of An Era

I firmly believe that we are at the end of an era right now. Certainly from a western perspective, the influence of our institutions is crumbling, our internal discourse has become bitter and our 'power' in the world is fading. The 'moral high ground' that the west once appeared to hold, especially at the height of the Cold War, is now all but lost. In this 21st century information age it is up to us all as individuals to carve out an identity and a living for ourselves, and those that do not will be left behind.

I do not claim to be a leading authority on the political and social changes that we have lived through over the last century, but all my reading and studying of literature and documentary films leads me to a certain understanding of how we have arrived at this precipice. I can see that the neoliberal model of capitalism is no longer working for us, and indeed for some time it has actually been destructive. Perhaps one of the biggest reasons why it continues to pervade is the absence of large-scale motivation for a new and better system.

I consider myself extremely fortunate to have found the work of visionaries like Adam Curtis, Peter Joseph and The Zeitgeist Movement, and Noam Chomsky fairly early in life. There have been others, and there is bound to be more, but so far these sources have illuminated the causes of the current state of affairs to me the most. Chomsky's writings deftly highlight the US drive towards imperialism and hegemony, whilst the films of Curtis reveal how the west has packaged and sold us capitalism on a plate. Both identify how the western military-industrial complex has rampaged across the world to serve purely its own interests, and how politicians and mainstream media have manufactured our consent for their actions.

For many people, capitalism is very much tied up in the concepts of freedom and democracy. They cite failed states and dictatorships of the past as evidence that capitalism is the only way. The old 'us and them' thinking seems to permeate. Chief among these is the perverse logic that if you aren't a capitalist then you must be a socialist (read communist). Clearly this is, at best, the outdated thinking of an older generation. The legacy of the Cold War obviously cuts deep in some minds. They come unstuck when China is mentioned however, a communist economic superpower just doesn't fit into their mindset.

For me, freedom and democracy are concepts that only truly exist relative to one's situation. You either deal with the boundaries and limitations placed upon you by the government of the country you live in or you emigrate to a more favourable country. It is ironic that those countries so often championed as bastions of free speech and freedom of the press are now enacting some of the most draconian mass-surveillance programs in living memory. It is the very same countries who adopt the most militant policies on the world stage against whatever is the current chosen 'evil regime', whilst completely ignoring other despots because they are 'allies'.

The Zeitgeist Movement offers us a vision of one possible future model for civilisation. The resource-based economy is an attractive concept and certainly worthy of further study, but I fear that the change necessary to achieve anything close to it is a very long way off. It is hard to imagine the idea as anything more than a utopian dream at present, however one can extract some parts of the model and apply them to the near future. Certainly, the issue of increased automation and resulting changes to human employment and the economy, along with climate change and how we can deal with it, are matters so pressing that we definitely need systemic change.

Ultimately, I believe that there is no one system which can carry humanity forward, but there are positive parts to the existing models and definite benefits to some new thinking. The very worst thing that we can do is to continue to get bogged down with the thinking of the past. We have to discard our prejudices, dispense with traditions and reform all our institutions if we are to thrive. Sadly, the current crop of politicians and their rich backers are unlikely to share this view. After all, it is in their best interests to maintain the neoliberal capitalist doctrine that keeps them in power.

"Capitalism does not permit an even flow of economic resources. With this system, a small privileged few are rich beyond conscience, and almost all others are doomed to be poor at some level. That's the way the system works. And since we know that the system will not change the rules, we are going to have to change the system." - Martin Luther King Jr.

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Letting Go

Recently I have found that the concept of solitude, and conversely my sense of community, have very much been at the forefront of my thoughts. I seem to be re-evaluating the value I place in my human interactions, both in the past and currently. I find myself drawn to that old poem by John Donne, "no man is an island", and yet simultaneously to the words of Jean-Paul Sartre, "hell is being locked in a room forever with your friends". I see the logic and wisdom of both, but how is one to reconcile these two conflicting truths?

It strikes me that what we are dealing with here is fundamentally rooted in attachment. Psychology has much to say about how our early attachment to others shapes our subsequent interactions. The nature and strength of our relationship to our parents and others around us during our formative years plays an enormous role in shaping our future social interactions. As we grow beyond these early years we go through different stages of attachment. It is inevitable that we will find ourselves having to evaluate which attachments are healthy and which are not.

I have seen the benefits and consequences of human attachment played out in my life and I can draw conclusions about who I am based on these. For instance, I can cite the deaths of my beloved paternal grandparents when I was ten and eleven years old as having a huge impact on me and understand how this affected my relationships with family and friends during the subsequent years. On reflection it is possible to identify negative patterns in one's behaviour and choices that stem from disruptions to, or distortions in, our early attachments in life.

I believe, however, that there is a universal rule of thumb that applies regardless of our personal history. We all require a certain degree of solitude, and we also all need to feel a part of a community. Some people are isolated due to circumstances beyond their control whilst others choose the life of a hermit. Both states are unhealthy, but being alone is something which we all need. It's just a question of how much. Some people are a part of communities which foster dependence and intolerance of outsiders, but we all need to find a healthy way to find a sense of belonging.

I am certainly a person who requires quite a lot of alone time. Those times in my life when I have had long periods where I have been unable to get enough time alone have by far been the worst parts of my life. I am completely comfortable within myself and enjoy my solitude, however, I am also acutely aware of how much I need my children, my wife, my family and my work colleagues and friends. I do feel I am missing a real community though, and it is a growing sense of loneliness that is the result. I am seeking interactions with a certain peer group that I currently feel alienated from - writers, artists, musicians, intellectuals and philosophers. I remain optimistic, however, that this will come with time and effort.

We all need to do a certain amount of ongoing work in order to have healthy interactions in our lives. We have to maintain our relationships whilst evaluating their benefit to us and others. Whether we have a large social circle or a few close friends, we cannot simply establish relationships and leave them to take care of themselves. If we are to stay healthy and grow in life then we have to accept that there will be some who we will have to leave behind. Sometimes the bonds we formed in the past simply elapse and the relationship becomes unhealthy.

Some people are easier to leave behind than others. Sometimes you realise it's just because things have gotten toxic, you're toxic together, so you cut them off to preserve your sanity, and theirs. Sometimes though, you hold on to ties for the wrong reasons. And any time the reason to hold on isn't because you mutually benefit from the connection, it's time to end it. Acquaintance, drinking buddy, friend, family member or partner - the universal rule applies - if it no longer benefits your path, your journey and your personal growth, they've got to go. It's just a question of how hard it is to break free, because once you let go of them you'll realise that your load is much lighter, and you can move on apace.

"Letting go means to come to the realisation that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny" - Steve Maraboli

Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.

Gotta' Have Faith

Never talk religion or politics, right? Wrong. This rule of thumb is, I believe, based on the premise that talking about these matters always causes arguments. I would challenge that by simply saying that if you can't hold a discussion/debate about these things without descending into arguing then you need to fundamentally examine the reasons why, because in 21st century life we need to be talking about them.

Let's put politics aside for this post and centre on religion..

My experience of religion began during school. I attended a Roman Catholic primary school and so was indoctrinated from a young age into what my young mind found to be a scary, intimidating religion. My early vision of God was of a terrifyingly vengeful overlord, commanding an army of creatures that resembled children with wings, who would swoop down and punish me if I did anything wrong. By the age of ten, unsurprisingly, I had a lot of questions.

My secondary school was also Roman Catholic. Here I encountered some of the most authoritarian zealots it has ever been my misfortune to endure, and that was just the teachers! Frequent mandatory attendance of masses, hymn recitals, forced participation in prayer, and generally being told I was unworthy and sinful ensured that, within a year of being there, I was already rebelling. In short order I hated it all. They would not answer my questions, I was punished for even having them. I left secondary education with an unmistakable, even if somewhat buried notion that religion was not a good thing, however I still believed in the God concept and a good deal of the associated dogma.

For several years after I left school and well into my twenties I found spiritual matters intriguing and was exposed to some major religious texts, the Bible, Torah, Koran and the Upanishads in particular, and also developed a fascination with occult, wiccan and pagan beliefs. 'Paranormal' phenomena fascinated me. I was also reading a lot of psychology and some of the 'spiritual growth' literature that litters the self-help section of bookshops. I was searching for meaning, for the answers to those questions that I left primary school with, that were ruthlessly ignored in the subsequent years. I did have some amazing moments of clarity. I gained an invaluable insight into the basis for some of the worlds major religions. Some of my questions were answered, but only to create new questions.

That period feels like the halycon days to me now. I came out of my twenties still basically a believer, but with some serious doubts. I guess I got to a point where I decided I'm not religious but somewhat 'spiritual'. Since then many things have shaped my opinions on the God concept, religion and spirituality. These musings have kind of come to a head lately, and although my views (as ever) are subject to change without notice pending new information, I have made certain conclusions about religion, faith and spirituality.

I am an atheist. If it was mandatory to be part of an institution of belief then I would be a Humanist (thankfully it isn't). I'm not one of those militantly atheist folk though, the type usually associated with Dawkins or Hitchens. I am fundamentally opposed to forcing my views on others, and I feel no need to vehemently disprove other peoples theories or beliefs. I do not believe in God, heaven, angels, an afterlife or miracles. For me, these concepts all fit into the broad category of 'magical thinking', along with so-called paranormal phenomena such as ghosts, UFO's, time-travel etc. I believe in science. I trust the scientific method to provide me with answers to life's fundamental questions, both now and in the future. Where religious folk gain comfort from God, and spiritual or 'paranormal' explanations satisfy some, I am comforted by the explanations of science, logic and reason.

Does this mean that I believe religion is bad or wrong? Of course not. Too many people throw the baby out with the bathwater, citing the suffering and death meted out by humanity in the name of religion as good enough reason to condemn it. I do understand that viewpoint, I too find religious intolerance and persecution intolerable, indeed it would be easy given my early indoctrination to hate Catholics, to hate all people of faith, but reason and logic combined with my sense of humanity and empathy will not allow me to. I understand why faith is important to people and if organised religion satisfies their needs then I would not only support them but defend their right to believe.

In some ways I occasionally envy the simplicity and certainty that faith seems to provide people. I believe fundamentally that the need to believe in God stems from two facts of human nature. We are all alone within ourselves, inside our own minds. It is not easy or comfortable to be alone so we prefer to believe in a God who is always with us. One day we are all going to die. The idea that at that point we just cease to be is almost unbearable so we choose to believe that we will ascend to heaven to be with God forever. For me, getting to the point where I am now has meant conquering my inbuilt fear of being alone, and of one day dying. I believe I have arrived. Being alone does not perturb me, I am completely comfortable within myself. I have very difficult moments, but who doesn't? Naturally I do not want to die for a long time. I feel I have much to contribute and much to live for, but I am comfortable that one day I will die and that will be the end of me. Any fear of dying is countered by my will to contribute as much as I can while I am alive.

I'll conclude with this quote from the amazing mind of Albert Einstein - “A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.”


Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.