Difference is..

It often truly sucks to be 'different' doesn't it?

It's fine if we choose to be different, to express our individuality through our image, our choice of culture, our beliefs, our thoughts and views, our words and deeds - and as long as we aren't forcing our individuality upon other people, this is something to be celebrated right?

For many though, being different is not a lifestyle choice. It is an affliction.

Despite all the good work that has been done in recent years, and the continuing great work of many dedicated individuals and organisations, to raise awareness and combat the stigmatisation of those with physical, mental and neurological disabilities, we still live in a society that often totally fails to treat the most vulnerable with the respect they deserve, and that fails to place value in people with disability issues despite the massive contribution they have to offer us.

People who live with any kind of long term chronic condition, illness or disability which affects their ability to live their daily lives independently, and yet thrive in spite of these conditions, truly do have so much to offer us all in terms of teaching us about resilience, strength of will and courage against all the odds. To negate or ignore the importance and value of that contribution is a crime in and of itself.

When you have accepted people looking down on you, treating you with disdain and derision, taking advantage of your vulnerabilities and generally judging you as inferior and/or maladjusted all your life, it can be very hard to break through the self-deprecation and stigmatisation that inevitably become a massive feature within your sense of self. It can be very damaging to your identity, and can create emotional and psychological problems on top of your often already highly challenging mental and physical health situation.

People judging and looking down on you is one thing, but it is often also the case that even others around you who are generally well-meaning and considerate of your disabilities just don't know how to handle their interactions with you. They often overcompensate and unintentionally make life more difficult and awkward for you, or they make your disability an issue when it doesn't need to be, or just generally tend to avoid fully being a part of your life - seemingly to save your feelings or to avoid 'offending you' - but really I believe the motivation is often a more selfish drive to avoid their own awkwardness and lack of awareness of your condition or impediment.

Different types of disability bring their own unique shades of difficulty in negotiating the world, but they also bring their own unique kinds of challenges when it comes to other people's perceptions. I wouldn't dream of generalising or suggesting one individual's disability challenges are harder than another, based on my meagre experience or the less than complete picture I have gained from reading of disabled peoples experiences. I do have experience of my own personal issues, not to mention friends and family with their own disabilities and who have children with long term conditions, and who care for disabled people though. It's not about one persons struggle versus another, of course, but I would suggest that it may well in some ways be more difficult for people with 'invisible' disabilities to face the reactions and behaviour of others towards them than it is for those with more obvious physical conditions.

If you are wheelchair-bound, use a mobility scooter, walk with a stick or other mobility device, have an obvious limp or prosthetic limb, or face the outside world with any other physically apparent disability, at least other people can see you obviously have that impediment and tend to make some effort to give you space, open doors for you, ask you if they can be of assistance, or whatever. I feel that for those with any of the multitude of hidden disabilities though - mental illness, chronic pain, nerve and immune disorders, and all the other less obvious physical conditions - there is often at best an 'out of sight out of mind' kind of thing going on with other people, and at worst a prevailing poor attitude and even lack of belief that you even have the illness or disability. For those with neurological conditions such as autism spectrum disorders, ADD/ADHD and similar disabilities, this poor attitude and lack of awareness seems to be even further entrenched and apparent.

It is my hope that with the continued drive by brave individuals and great campaigning organisations, public awareness of all kinds of disability and the ways in which long term impediments and chronic conditions affect every aspect of people's lives, and through efforts to prevent and eliminate the stigmatisation of differently-abled people, we will see a corresponding increase in the growth of compassion, awareness and understanding of the needs of disabled people, and a furthering of their right to live independent lives and to contribute to society.

Vulnerability and disability must be combated by empowerment, opportunity and equality at all levels, if we truly want to live in a compassionate, humane and just world.



Copyright ©2018 Richard C. Greenlow. All rights reserved.